


I Care

by xo_marauders



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Depression, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pain, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-11-16 04:11:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18087188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xo_marauders/pseuds/xo_marauders
Summary: Remus is feeling quite low after a particularly bad moon. Sirius shows up to comfort him.





	I Care

**Author's Note:**

> (TW: some depressing thoughts)

Pain.   
  
That was the first thing Remus registered as he woke up in the dusty, cold shack; the immense _pain_ coursing through his entire body. His bones felt out of place, which likely meant that some of them were, and his head hurt so much that when he opened his eyes his vision was blurred around the edges giving him tunnel vision. He closed them quickly.   
  
_Please, stop. Oh, please...._  
  
Remus wasn’t sure what he was pleading for. The pain to end or for _everything_ to end. He hated this. He hated becoming a monster every month and ripping himself apart to the point where he couldn’t even move a finger. He hated feeling so weak and disgusting. Tears ran down his cheeks, burning the new scars that had been added onto his young face during the night.   
  
He laid there hopelessly, facing the ceiling, not even bothering to try and clean himself up. There were small pools of blood around him but, there always were so it didn’t bother him much now.   
  
_Why is this my life? Why is it me who has to bear this burden? Why couldn’t it have been someone else?_  
  
_Stop that,_ Remus chastised himself _. How could you wish this, of all things, on someone else? Maybe you are a monster..._  
  
Remus’ self deprecating thoughts were interrupted by the squeak of a door opening. Hesitantly, he opened his eyes again and squinted toward the doorway, his vision still very blurry. A pair of gray eyes were peaking around the corner at him, as if waiting for permission to come in.   
  
“...Sirius?”

“Hey there, Rem.”   
  
The other boy made his way into the room and over to Remus, quickly draping a blanket across his body to allow him his modesty. Remus just stared up at Sirius as he began to clean the cuts across the young werewolves chest and face. The look on his face was perfectly plain, never wrinkling up in disgust or disdain. Maybe an occasional smirk when he caught Remus’ eye but other than that; nothing.   
  
Remus found this strange. Even his mother couldn’t keep the pity and sadness out of her eyes when he was back at home lying in his family’s cellar while she patched him up after the full moons. His father certainly couldn’t keep the look of shame out of his eyes. But Sirius...Sirius just looked perfectly unbothered by the blood and bruises and all Remus could do was just stare at him. All of the pain he was feeling was now sitting in the back of his mind—still there—but not as unbearable as it once was. He was too focused on Sirius now and the way his dark hair fell into his face every time he leaned down and how his lips parted slightly as he concentrated on healing Remus’ wounds and how gentle his hands were...  
  
“Remus?”   
  
“Hm?”   
  
“Do you think you can move?”   
  
Remus gave a slight nod before propping himself up in his elbows only to fall back to the floor with a cry. _Useless_ , _weak_ , _pathetic_...  
  
Sirius didn’t say anything. He just wrapped the blanket tighter around Remus before pulling the frail boy into his arms, gently rocking him back and forth, careful as to not bother his injuries. Remus bit down hard on his lip, tears threatened to spill from his eyes, but it was not because of the pain. The young werewolf just couldn’t comprehend why his friend was there treating him so kindly even with all the scars and bruises on his body that proved how monstrous he could be. Didn’t Sirius realize that? How dangerous Remus really was? Why on earth was he acting so nonchalant about it all?

“Why are you here, Sirius?” Remus’ voice came out rough and scratchy from all the screaming and howling he’d done, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care at the moment.   
  
“I couldn’t leave you out here alone to wait for Pomfrey, Rem. You’re always there when I need you so...I figured I owed the same in return. You are...well...I care about you a lot, Remus. You’re so good and kind. I wish I could be more like you because you’re pretty amazing, no matter what you think about yourself.”   
  
The tears that fell from Remus’ eyes were silent but Sirius knew they were there. He didn’t comment on it, he just pulled his friend closer to him and placed a soft kiss on the top of Remus’ curly hair.   
  
“I’m a monster, Siri...”   
  
“You’re not a monster, Rem. You’re only a wolf once a month.”   
  
“Yeah and I rip myself apart like a monster.”   
  
“We’ll find a way to prevent you from hurting yourself. James, Peter and I. We’ll find a way to help you.” Sirius said, the determination in his face unwavering. Remus just stared up at Sirius again, trying to understand why he would go out of his way to help such a lost cause.   
  
“Sirius?”   
  
“Hm?”   
  
“Thank you. For being here. I...it just really means a lot to me. No one has ever cared for me this much.”

Remus caught Sirius’ eye and his stomach fluttered a bit. Sirius bit down on his lip slightly as he stared back at the boy in his arms. They stared at one another, neither one daring to ruin the small moment they had created. Sirius’ hand slowly came up to cup Remus’ face gently as he leaned in closer to him.   
  
“I care. I’ll always care about you. I love you, Remus.”   
  
Sirius brushed their lips together slightly, as if asking for permission. Remus pushed up into the kiss, effectively deepening it. Nothing mattered in that moment to Remus. The pain he felt, the self-loathing, it all vanished. The only thing that existed for him in those few minutes was Sirius and the way his lips moved against his own. Sirius, who cared about him, and held him, and kissed him.   
  
Sirius who _loved_ him.   
  
And Remus loved him right back.  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading
> 
> Tumblr: @xomarauders


End file.
